ok thursday- me nd charlie are cool asgen . we went to go see anh do . i think charlies bro is pissed at me cs he told me not to check whos talk show im going to buhi was to oeager so i checked it up and it was anh do !

and i sed to him on the fone .. whos anh do ? and he got pissed and is never trustngm e agen ==

neways it was a good day . buh i wish i oculdve spent more time with him . i couldnt do muc hfor his bdae sincei was broke , and this year i am feeling guilty .

law drove me home that day , we went to pick up charlies cousin from work at parra.

good day .

friday-

i think all my friends are pissed thati didnt go ivys party, and i always ditch them so no, im not guna say sorry anymore cs i know it doesnt mean anything . neways i was guna go buh my mum called me and asked me to hang with her. and i didnt family time so i agreed to come and ditch the party .

i have decided to pick

- stand eng

-mathematics

-food tech

-bio

- eco

-ext math

and fundamentals of eng .

i hope i get what i want .

neways we went olympic park to go swimming .

we put the babies in childcare and rayyan kept screaming, banging on the door wanting to get out . so my mum had to rush a 20 min gym session with reylene . reylene needed to lose some fat LOL .

then we went swimming . gg , i told emi dont wana wet my hair , buh they still wet my hairo n purpose .==

buh oh well it was fun , me nd reylene accessed the members bathroom and it had a blow dryer , so all gooood .

neways my mum had to go doctors at 1 so i told her id come then go sarahs house . cs she needed hel pwith the babies. afterwards we got a lil snack to eat . and then my mum droppped me to sarahs house . i love sarahs house LOL .

i got there at 3ish . and then i 4got to tell my dad i was there . i couldnt find my phone in my bag so i thoughti left it in my mums car . so i told her to drop it to nme on sautrday morinng since we agreed reylene would come to charlies bdae outing with me to teppanyaki .

neways i practised till 7 . and the recording wasnt good until 8 . and sarah agreed to let me record and play whilst the original music was on .

then since sarah couldnt remix the video , we had to hold the fone camera to the computer screen and record it like that =.=

oh well . i elfth er house at 8 ish and walked to strath station . a 40-50 min walk . i know it sounds long buh i like taking long walks on my own . just thinking and refleccting back on my life what wouldve happened if i did this or that, and also making up and excuse to my rents when i got home

neways i goth ome 930 ish and i didnt get into too much trouble . my dad was telling me how he loves me hanging with my friends sicnei n ever do , buh next tym all i needa do is ask .

great day . i didnt regret it , buh i wish the day coudlve been a bit lnoger so i couldve went ivys party . oh btw , hapyp badae ivy ! for today =]

saturday -

today my family had another lame bbq omg . neways at 3 i asked my step mum to ask my dad if i could go otu to a party . i lied that it was a party for my friend buh eh . my step dad didnt let reylene go out with me . he hates reylene hanging with me since im a bad influence and is always getting into shit .buh att hr end i was allowed to go . and we went teppan yaki and there was like 15 dudes Oo" . it was a great day . we had to catch egg in a bowl and charlie got egged three times LOL .

and we had to catch fried rice and i droppedi t and it fell on my pants == . and we had to catch egg in our mouth =D yumyum .

if yu wana see fotos go charlies facebook.

for all 16 people , we usedi think $672

its a great experience . it great going with a group of friends .

neways charlies bro drove me nd phillip home .

sunday-

i practically did ntohing all day . sat all day at home feeling angry with myself .

-friends are psised

-charlie .

-dad was annoying me

-my mums psised

-step dad doesnt want me with reylene

-reylene was psised at me

just i hate when everyone is angry at me . just fucking try and understand . i have enough stress . first from rents then school , then everything else in life gets screwed up .

like wdf , i have enough to worry about .

sometimesi hate being me , buh that would sound careless and selfish wouldnt it ? "oh that michelle girl , gee , so ungrateful , look aat other people who have even worst problems "

well too bad for you people . you cant stop howi feel right now . and everyone is selfish at times and think of their own problems . no matter how much it doesnt sound "that bad "

i fucking didnt even finish my assignment . and im pissed and is pmsing . great, even more to think of .

i felt a tad happy when charlei sed , something about even if the whole world is against me someone still loves me . no offence or anything , buh after thinking , that may be the case at the moment , but what abotu when yur pissed at me , when you dont wana talk to me , when yur guna leave me one day ? who will look after me then . thats when id truly be alone and id have nowun . im just thinking realistically . and that would happen i nthe future . just like everyone always says " nothing lasts forever nomatter how much you want it to "

neways today . im jigging school tofinish my assignment . damn , im missing out on excursion , subject selection to be submitted, history test and geo assignment due .

oh well . i want to study a bit more . and for the time being , i just really wana live in my own little world so i could do anything id want , without being angry at myself or having peopel angry at me .

thats all . i dont mean to offend anyone, but thats how i feel at times.

goals:

- use money on only the neccessary things

-go out less

-pass yr 10

-jig less

- balance love and social life

-do my school where when i have to , and not keeping it till alst minute

- fix up my english

-practise essay writting more often

-stop pissing off the whole world